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While lists and steps provoke thought and provide wisdom and structure, they cannot fix your life, transform you into Churchill, or heal your broken heart.

With all the choices and information about relationships we now have available to us, I am still surprised by how many people jump into serious partnerships -- business, close friendships and yes, marriages -- without laying any groundwork to see if the other is on the same page about the future. Final post in the Leadership in Relationship series.

When you clarify your roles in relationship and bring consciousness to the leadership in them, something sacred happens. All the energy dedicated to jockeying for power and position gets contained in conscious roles, and frees you up to really focus on loving and on things you love to do together.

In the fourth post in the Leadership in Relationship Series, Amber and her boyfriend use leadership principles to co-create a partnership that diminishes drama, minimizes the tendency to get emotionally wound up and take everything personally, and increase the flow of communication, connection and closeness.

The heart itself is not always a trustworthy leader. It simply is. It likes what it likes. It loves things that are good for it, it loves things that are bad for it. It’s up to us to discriminate, to steer the ship that rides on heart's waves. The second article in the Leadership in Relationship series.

Even if you’re in a good relationship, a great relationship, it can be pretty easy to lose touch with your partner. When you lose touch with your primary partner, you can lose full access to your heart, your vitality and your natural good cheer, or, as they like to say, holiday spirit.

I'm not going to be telling you how to "be with your loneliness" in the hopes that one day you will be more like the rest of us grown-ups, chasing kids around and secretly feeling nostalgic for the days when our lives looked like yours. I don’t hope for you -- unless it’s your heart’s desire-- that you will be partnered soon and eventually forget this time.

Every Valentine’s Day is different for me, and it’s different for each person on the planet. For some, it’s a day to remember to write a poem, make a fancy reservation, buy the chocolate, order the flowers or pick out the jewels. Hopefully, if this is you, you feel grateful, generous, hardly obliged. For many, it’s a day to remember that some holidays are commercial inventions, because companies like Hallmark and 1-800-Flowers need them to be. And retail stores definitely...

Although there are "hookless" ways to establish closeness and intimacy, hooking can eventually lead to meaningful relationships. But there is a difference between being "hooked on" someone and forming a healthy attachment to them.